Kabir Kadre
Kabir Kadre

Thinking of gratitude

Kabir Kadre|1 year, 7 months ago

Light fading on a winter’s day. Still small finches and hummingbirds in the pine tree outside. It might be just me, but it seems the red tail hawk is soaring lower in the sky these days, below the horizon line, a bit more in the valley.

I seem to be sleeping better these days, last night was mostly exemplary, though I did have some unsettling pandemic dreams of trying to stay clear of the infection. Another adventure movie, not too uncommon for me.

I woke to a productive morning, my new much larger phone screen serving its purpose of bringing the office to the bed quite as well as intended. I managed to catch up on the class I’m taking, as well as professional correspondence, email, and a good long meditation.

Vanessa was making a special appearance today, covering for my current absence of Sunday morning support. She arrived a little after nine, a bit tired, but in good form and humor nonetheless.

I was up and about by 10:30 AM to start the weekly review. Vanessa to the kitchen started building our morning smoothies. Breakfast was in the garden in the late morning sun. The air was still cool and crisp, but the light felt nice and we lingered after drinks, taking some photographs of the hillside, drinking in the new piles in the open garage, and surveying the fountain and its needed repairs.

This was the first weekly review in over a month where I arrived to it from a reasonably stable runway and not some chaotic turbulence of the unexpected and difficult to manage. I thank in no small part my very real angels for this.

I followed up again with the property manager of the hopeful apartment, still trying to get a copy of the lease to review in anticipation of a possible December 1 acquisition. They seem to be treading slowly and carefully there after my raising the concerns of discrimination.

The afternoon was mostly quiet, Nova and I co-working, she from her room occasionally coming out to the whirr of the printer to check on papers, check on me, and chat for a moment. I spent the time focused on correspondence. My inbox of informal messages from friends has been building up and today I had a dozen back messages from Dave since September to catch up into the fold.

We did find a few minutes to decant the coffee that has been brewing in the fridge since my hospitalization, now a deep rich cold brew a bit unlike anything I’ve had before. We took a little cream, I coconut, she almond, and out to relish the last rays of sunshine in the front. The sun dropped behind the house, the air now without warmth, and it was back to work at the desk…

Intermingling that with a short call to Elisa over lunch with Nova, and another with Eliana, and the setting sun left me feeling a bit accomplished, though mostly in a sense of domestic achievement. Monday morning will bring the onset of activities no doubt.

The car sale is all but complete with only an effort to gain some refund on 10 months of unused registration remaining. Housing is in holding waiting for word on the apartment, and the wrangling of the garage and boxing efforts here. Care too is on the final notes of an exhale as I contemplate the very real need to increase the cost of my offer if I am to find the qualified people to ground that effort.

All of these for Monday, and more.

Part of the class work this morning was simply to attention for a moment the presence of Gratitude as a living emanation of the deepest source of being. Among the bits, this poem was a nice gesture in the flow.

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God gets to know things, we just get to ask questions…