Kabir Kadre
Kabir Kadre

Reflecting on the pain…

|3 months, 21 days ago

It’s been a rough couple of weeks, months really.

“Tell me about it.” Smiles all of Ukraine.

Looking back over the calendar, the last time I had a week with no documented physical upsets, was mid-January. Most weeks have a few, and on over a dozen occasions in that. I’ve been forced to linger long in bed, or retire early.

Without going into the detail of the distresses (often mysterious in origin), I know I am not alone in this “personal” sense of turbulence. To say nothing of the impacts this War has been having on the hearts and psyches of those around me, I have personally witnessed real pain in the lives of friends and loved ones dear to me.

While I pray for my own health, as I pray for the health and well-being of the world and its humble inhabitants, I also brace myself for what may come. Escalation of war, massive species loss, economic hardship, further social decay… All of these are on the menu, chef’s special in fact, though perhaps, to degrees, avoidable.

As always, there are bright spots, bastions of hope, and the essential goodness of life to light our way through.

I stumbled upon an interesting reflection yesterday.…

From our human perspective, perhaps the worst case scenario which is NOT off the menu, is the total and complete desolation of the biosphere on our home. Sounds dramatic, but a few trigger-happy potential sociopaths could very realistically bring this to pass.

That would be profound tragedy indeed. Yet we may have an example to assure our hearts. It seems quite possible that Mars, our close neighbor, once suffered a fate of annihilation. Even so, here early in the 21st century on planet Earth, some mischievous monkeys are busily plotting the (return) of life to that long quiet rock.

There are enormous cycles at play here. Our lives, civilizations, planets even, arise and fall like flowers in spring and autumn. In the midst of this, we ourselves are open hearts, living threads of wonder, creativity, and embrace. In essence, we are love.

We are the very love the dances not just through, but as these enormous cycles of eternal bloom and decay.

Today, on earth, with eyes open, some part of us, at least, must weep for the pain and tragedies unfolding in these precious lives of hours. Yet we must also not lose sight of the gift of our nature, that most precious, seemingly fragile, yet unflinchingly enduring jewel of love.

That is free. We need do nothing at all to claim that birthright.

At choice, on the other hand, is beauty.

While love is enduring, beauty is becoming.

If we listen past our heartbreak, listen past our longing, listen past our joys, their in stillness, in possibility, in realization, lay our opportunity to further unfold, to evolve, to become something more…

That blossom, that blooming, is beauty. It is subjective in that it exists only within the looking, and it is unique to each one of us to discover what depths of our hearts longing to become becomes ever more sensitive, more subtle, more graceful in its capacity to express.

I, for instance, yearn to nurture systems. I yearn to ask better questions. I yearn to listen more carefully, to see more clearly. Another may wish greater coherence and communication, to be more efficient in their movement, to stop doubting their path…

Whatever it is, wherever we lean in, there beauty becomes. We are love. Love is beautiful. Beauty becomes love’s blossom, even in a desert of sadness, even in a world of pain.

I have much work to do (or so I say), life to navigate, simple concerns to manage, and a body that sometimes cooperates. It all can feel uncertain, it can feel certainly futile. But if I look, at the center of me, at the point that consumes all awareness, there is beautiful love becoming life profound and new in the moment.

What could I, but carry on.

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God gets to know things, we just get to ask questions…