Kabir Kadre
Kabir Kadre
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Handholds

Kabir Kadre|1 month, 2 days ago

Just off the phone with my dad for just a moment. He sounded weary and tired, have been that way for weeks he said. Opting not to strain his energy, I told him I loved him and that I would call again in the morning when he might feel more fresh.

Send prayers of well-being to a beautiful man in Montana.

This long day started for me about 2:30 AM, waking from a dream…

I had taken a literal run at a steep rock wall, making it about 10 feet up before finding I had no finger holds. As I contemplated backing down off the wall safely, I took a few steps back and managed to catch a grip. Beginning to climb up and to the left I could hear many voices applauding and cheering my “climbers grip” which I very much did not feel I had, though apparently I could also see that what grip I had seems to be good enough for now.

As I made my way a few more increments of the wall I found a good handhold underneath a slab. Old granite however and I could feel the piece (voice software transcribed “peace”) I was gripping, a large flat section threatened to lift off fall. Those around me could not see this and I struggled to find the balance and position and voice to call out to ensure that when I dropped the piece, it would not land on anyone below.

I woke from here… My body tremendously stiff and spastic. I lingered for a few minutes before deciding to make use of the time by sitting to meditate. I did so for about 40 minutes before returning prone to see if I might rest again. Rest I did, sleep I didn’t.

My body continued to convulse and spasm through the morning. Finally 6:30 AM arrived, I was dreary and knew I must effort to rise to meet the band of meditators soon to be joining me in the quiet room.

Meditation came and went, Patience stayed a while, writing in her journal. Stephanie I checked in and began the process of getting me up.

Wednesday morning clerical ran long troubleshooting more technology failures, two pieces now being replaced under warranty after a lovely conversation with a man working the graveyard shift for Google support in the Philippines.

This took longer than anticipated, leaving me just enough time to do most of the weekly financial management alongside a quick lunch before stepping out to see the good Dr. King in hopes of moving further along the process of adapting to these new body conditions arising in my experience.

Stephanie and I made our way out, masked up for our appointment and managed to say a few hellos to our friend Katie who manages the front desk at the Osteopathic Center. She was sweet, and touched, a recent death in her family had her feeling the tenderness more closely these days. It was good to connect with her, I recommended – as I have been with everyone these days – listening to Katie’s podcasts (other Katie) on the subject of grief.

Note to self to share this entry with Frank as he can likely forward the email to Katie whom I have no contact for.

Coming home for the afternoon and the next two hours would be spent in a training/coaching context with LB, doing the work of the heart and opening skillfully to our emerging global contexts…

Afterwards he turned his attentions to some care for the space and I began the document for our “drip” advertising to begin noticing our upcoming MettaCare Foundations workshop for mid-November. Tune into this blog tomorrow for more information. 😉

The sun is low now, just a little after six, the sky has appeared blue today though with looking, there has been much moisture up high. Traffic has become a bit more viscous it seems, and noise emanates from that.

In the dark last evening, there were many sirens, something about.


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God gets to know things, we just get to ask questions…