Kabir Kadre
Kabir Kadre
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Feeling speechless

|14 days ago

Feeling speechless…

Woke slowly this morning. Saw my friend Stephanie, for the first time in nearly a month. I woke feeling dehydrated. First order of business, one tall glass of water, one tall glass of coconut water.

Wounds on the backside nearly nonexistent. Up, slowly up. By 9 AM we were making our way down the hall and into the day.

Looks like the car sale will be going through. I had to go to the bank today to confirm the transaction process, felt like I was riding in someone else’s vehicle. I tend to personify cars, so it felt simultaneously as though I was riding in an old friend. Old friend indeed.

Getting dressed I noticed that my pants were about to go from stylishly tattered to gaping hole and decided to bite the bullet on a new pair from our friends at IZ. Today was about doing.

Following up on the rental property, urging interest to the property manager in efforts to stay in their focus. A friend was able to stop by there today and take some measurements, some surprises, but better prepared now should we get the green light to move in.

Also after running some math decided to give our latest care partners a little salary bump, not much, but something to recognize their commitment to this community and effort.

Meanwhile back to looking for new care took a pleasant turn, a young woman reached out this morning. Caught in clerical whirlwinds with the trust attorney, property manager, and banking contacts for the vehicle transaction, her text went un-tended longer than usual. Fortunately I did make the connection and she stopped by this afternoon, serendipitously with both Stephanie and Vanessa on hand to share in the conversation.

An hour later, she’s on the schedule and enjoying a bowl of David’s loving care stew. A nice young woman of Colombian descent, mother, wife, daughter, sister, nutritionist, and community heart. I’m looking forward to getting to know her better, and feeling the warmth of her soul radiating here.

The conversation with the lawyer went well and I have a better understanding of the unfolding process of transitioning from a fierce financial independence into a social services integrated portfolio picture.

In all, financial reorganization, shifting from property owner to renter, letting go of the vehicle, and looking for new care feels like setting out on a raft to cross a great river. I don’t know the other side, but the stream seems calm enough. I have traveled to this shore and feel well on my way in the journey.

Organizing my to do list today, Stephanie moving potted plants from the back to the front of the house, donating a garden table and chairs to her family, the unexpected outing to the bank, weight is being shed for balance on this new raft.

Turning in early this evening, Vanessa is here by special appointment, tomorrow will be a family meeting with David, Cassandra, Elisa and myself, a little down time on my own in the afternoon, then a special appearance by my friend Nova to help get me down for the night. She will then work an overnight shift and return early Sunday morning to raise my back from bed before retiring herself to hers.

Day by day right now, picking our way down this grassy and a little bit rocky hillside to the river’s edge…


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