“If all goes well…” I said. I knew when I wrote those words I was temping the gods. I almost didn’t write them. But, “what the heck” I thought to myself, it’s just writing…
This morning I have two new pressure sores.
It really was uncanny. Almost no sooner had I published the words and things, ever so gently, started coming off the rails. Nothing dramatic mind you, just those sweet little incongruencies we mere mortals often just write off as coincidence.
Those of us with an overactive sense of “seeing the divine in everything” on the other hand recognize the fingerprints of Zeus, Krishna, Allah, God, and others on the seeming coincidence of the lady from the agency being 90 minutes late, or the leg bag tube being just out of place enough, or LB following a little behind schedule and so out of balance in himself.
“I see…” I say, nodding my head in reverence and recognition of my hubris in the moment. “If all goes well…” Who says such things?! ? “Things” my dear, will go exactly as they go and not differently.
Rather than the substantive moving forward of a couple of significant projects yesterday, the day was spent in more broken moments of engagement, getting some things done, getting some sun, and learning opportunities for mindfulness and care for people.
Nearly all the things I had imagined accomplishing did not come to pass, but by the grace of those very gods whose loving mischief held my eyes to the humility of the path, the day also was filled with good work, good love, and good learning.
I was able to advance some Scoring work that has been lingering while I was away from my desk, and in the process learn greater nuance of my own insights in the field. I was able to update and polish a bit the recording of our recent MettaCare Strategy Dialogue. I returned to SOME of the loving correspondence that has been waiting now some for months patiently in my inbox for reply. I even privileged a few minutes in the late afternoon dialogue with Dennis, himself a glowing example of the glory of the path of humility.
As the day came to a close, the warmth going out of the air, just a little before the light would follow, LB and I sat down spoke of conflict, it’s ever present nature, and how we might hold it as a friend, a guide, a teacher in the space of our human affairs, and MettaCare in particular.
None of us “chooses” to create conflict except that first we find it within ourselves and failing to resolve it there, it expresses itself through our fractured integrity with the oneness of the world. Indeed, it is conflict within wholeness itself the fractures into the myriad parts of being, conflict is not the enemy, it is the essence of our nature in form.
My heart is broken, and so I love. Without those fine cracks in the perfect porcelain, I might sit content on some shelf, unused and collecting dust in perfect peace, never moving, never blinking, and myths all of this wild Divine mischief of the world.
God gets to know things, we just get to ask questions…